Sunday, January 6, 2013
You May Not Really Be A Friend
Not sure how long or short this is going to be....
I think I'm a pretty good friend and some of the people who say they're my friend, really aren't. I don't know if they know they aren't or what...
To people I call friend, I am VERY loyal. I'm not taking what they say to me and repeating that info to someone else. I'm not judging them for things they say or do and I'm going to do what I can if/when they need me and if/when they need me, no one else needs to know it. When my friends need prayer, I will petition the Lord on their behalf. Last, but not least, if I consider you a friend and you do something against me, in a moment of WTF, I will forgive you.
That sounds wonderful right? And having a friend like that is. It's a shame though that the friendship I put out is returned by so few, but if you have one good friend, that's all you really need and I've got a couple more than that.
Now I also watch other friendships. People who SAY they are friends to other people, IN MY OPINION whose friendship isn't worth ish. Facebook has given people a false sense of friendship.
I don't call them on it, because it isn't always my place and mostly none of my business, but if someone asks me, I'll surely give my opinion.
Since this is my blog, I will give my opinion:
You are not really a friend if you tell your friend's business to someone else.
You are not really a friend if you rely on them financially, often.
You are not really a friend if you keep a lot of secrets from them.
You are not really a friend if you don't support them or you get attitude if they can't do something for you.
You are not really a friend if you base your friendship on what they may/can do for you.
You are not really a friend if you try to create sob stories so your "friend" will want to help you.
You are not really a friend if you say you'll be there for them and you decide one day to just leave.
You are not really a friend if you do things for them, expecting things in return.
There are way too many friends out there who really aren't friends. If you recognize yourself in any of these YOU are the non-friend. I have had "friends" that have done at least one of each of these things to me.
I had to let them go. (A couple family members too) I had to realize that I shouldn't put their needs/wants before mine and that at some point a person has to grow up and I wasn't helping. I missed them at first, but nearly 20 years later, they are still stuck in the same place, depending on other people. So sad.
Don't get me wrong, there is some family that will treat you like 2 day old shit too, but this post is about friends.
To find a good, loyal friend, you need to be one.