Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Dating The Popular Guy
I'm not sure why, but I was reflecting on my most recent past relationship when I woke up this morning. Not so much on the person, but the experience.
Oh, now I remember...No matter how old some people get, they never really mature. I think this is a big part of failed friendships and relationships. Back in the 50's and 60's people married early and were taught to be responsible adults and somewhere along the way, that got lost on a lot of people.
What does paragraph one have to do with paragraph two? What does it have to do with the title? I promise I'll tie them together, LOL.
The last guy I dated was a very popular guy. He had a huge presence online and an even bigger one in real life. I'm still not sure how we ended up together. I know a lot of people, but I don't see myself as popular.
Anyway, a couple of things that I noticed during that relationship are that his popularity shot mine up I started getting all kinds of friend requests, especially from women. The reality of it though is that they were mostly befriending me to get closer to him (there's the maturity thing or lack of, so high school). I knew what it was about, so I generally didn't add them. Those I did, I watched like a father that has a 14 year old girl that looks 28!
The flip side to that is that I had women who despised me because I was with him. They wouldn't speak when we were together, they would speak and would afterward promptly ignore me or they'd be sweet as pie and talk about me like two dogs afterward (How do I know? People have no loyalty these days either).
Did I bring these things up to him? Yes I did. What did he say? Oh you're grown, handle that. When it came to a point that I did handle a stank situation, then I was wrong.
I could only deal with so much of that cycle before I walked away. The day I decided I'd had enough I think he was stunned because that's just not the kind of thing he's used to. No one walks away from the popular guy.
Well I did. Some days I miss being in a relationship, then I remember that experience and get over it. Honestly, when you're in a relationship with the popular guy, you're kind of in a relationship with all his cronies too because someone is always there, hanging on his coat tails.
And really, I don't think he'd have it any other way...
I have a few Facebook friends who have similar followings. I refuse to even comment on most of their statuses because I don't want to look like one of their Facebook groupies, I mean fans. In fact, I usually tease them because it's obvious each woman posts something to make it appear as if they have a deeper, more personal friendship (so mature).
Y'all can have all that fanfare. I'll take my personal, less known, REAL friendship over that mess any day and let folks speculate the nature of it. They'll come up with a story more interesting than the truth anyway.